I Miss You so Much Dew Drop

Looking out the window, all I can do is hope.
Words simply can't describe
My feelings for you
For my feelings are so many
But words, there are so few.

Encouragement you gave me
And a connection that is true
I'm glad while reaching out
I found someone like you.

You gave your love so sweetly
I am lost if you are away
You have me so completely
I cherish you night and day.

You make me laugh
When i want to cry
You make me happy
When you don't even try.

Your laugh makes me smile
You make my life a better place
I love everything about you
You're someone I could never replace.

It's you that keeps me up all night
The one getting me through the day
And so it seems to me that there
Is only one thing left to say

I don't know how to say it enough
To make it sound so true
So I'll say it how I feel it
I'm in love with you.

No distance can keep us apart
You are someone I can't forget
You will always be in my ehart
I know I'll be with you yet.

I will tell you from my heart
We will never drift apart
You keep me from being blue
And I love you for being you.

It's painful to be without you here
Wanting to hear your voice
Feel your touch
Every day my eyes wander over your letter
Hope bursting at all my seams
I miss you Megels
My heart yearning for our adventure.

Always.

Love, Your Edward
xooxoxoxooxoooxxxxoxxxxoxoxoxoxxxo

The Time I Wished Upon a Star

I'm dreaming of you all day

I'm thinking of you all night

I wish I could be with you

I wish I could tell you

How much I need you

How much I miss you

I've fallen in love and I'm loving it

I don't know how

I don't know why

But my eyes are always looking for you

And my heart is feeling you

I wish you could hear me

I wish you could hug me

That's all I want, that's all I need

I need the most and I want you to realize

You dwell in my world, you dwell in my dreams

Enter my world and adorn my life

Put on your wings and be ready to fly

We'll make our world a world full of love and happiness

Let's make it happen, let's make it real

I promise I'll love you forever

And will never leave you ever

The time I wished on a falling star

I found you in my life

From that time on

You are the reason I believe

I believe in love

I believe in myself

I believe in the world

I feel overwhelmed

With moments that we share

Moments of life

Moments of joy

Moments of walking hand in hand in light and dark

It happens to be a secret

Meeting you was not accidental but for a purpose

Purpose to continue the untold story

Purpose to travel the journey of fantasy

Purpose to be together forever

I miss you so much my butterflies weep

One day again I hope to hold you

I love you like crazy Megels darlin

May my words reach your heart

Day after day

Always

Love, Your Edward

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxo

Until You

No matter what day it is Megels darling
I awaken with thoughts of you
Consumed by your presence in my mind
I can feel your touch
I smell the essence of your skin
You're intoxicating
As I look beside me, no one is there
But your light radiates around me
I close my eyes to feel your touch on my skin
I shiver from the excitement that you bring
If I have only fallen into my thoughts
Let me never awaken
For you are the sweet sounds of the night
Calming as the deep blue sea, for which I wish to be
Our love carries me through each day
My memories of us fill my nights
And your love, dear princess, takes my heart to the heights of heaven
Be with me always so that I stay in this place of pure bliss
I was miserable until you
The day that we met I was thinking of not going out at all
Lucky I did because I met you that lucky day
I was sad, depressed, and didn't care about anything
Then you showed up and turned my world upside down
You turned my frown upside down
No one has been able to do that in a long time
I look at you and you look back
You ask me what is wrong
I say nothing, I've just been wondering where you have been all my life
You say that you were wondering the same about me
I smile and think that you are just perfect
I tell you
Until you I wanted the world to end
Until you I had nothing to look forward to in the day
Until you I was just part of the crowd
Then when I had you, all of that was just the opposite
No one can ever change that
When I am with you
You complete me and my life
You give life more meaning than I ever thought it could
My love for you burns brighter than anything
I love you dew drop
So very much

Always

Love, Your Edward
xoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

I Dream of Dancing with You

Rain drops fall on the street

The sounds of the car tires splashing by fill my morning ears

The warmer temperature fills my head with memories

Memories of us and the life living with you

I can feel my stomach drop being filled with sadness

I try not to cry but my mind continues on

There you are with your beautiful hazelnut brown eyes

That glisten when you smile

I dream of dancing with you in the ballroom

Flying away with you with your arms wrapped around me

Every move is so graceful, weightless, and effortless

As we glide on the beautiful marble floor

The lights are dimmed with just a touch of bronze lighting

Beaming down from the vintage chandelier

We are completely and irrevocably in this moment

If only I were yours and you were mine

I can't help but wonder what is going on inside your head

Do I control my infatuation for you?

Is this a secret that must stay hidden?

From the moment I first saw you

There was a spark of peace and mutual energy

That will forever rest inside my brain and in my thoughts

It was so strong that I constantly think about it

And wonder if that is something

That could be permanent for me rather than a brief moment of interaction

A brief exchange of hope and energy

I couldn't help myself but to be close to you

Some way

Some how

I believe there are only a handful of people

That come across your path

That can make you feel more than simply human

You make me feel alive

You make me feel hopeful

You make me feel assured

That there is hope out there

I wish to be close to you right now

To hold your hand and admire your smile

I would treasure your intelligence and witty personality

I would kiss every inch of you for the rest of my days

I miss you so much Megels my darling

While the world around may be rainy and cold

It's always sunny when my thoughts are filled with you

Always

Love, Your Edward

xoxoxxooxoxxooxoxxxoxoxoxoxooxxoxoooox

Together We Will Face Somber Rainy Days

The season calls for cold and alone
The forecast being with you was always sunny and warm
I miss you very much
Like I've been lost at sea for years
I want so badly to have more memories created with you
Megels, for your love
There's nothing I wouldn't do

Say yes, and we could surf the highest waves
Your hand in mine, never losing faith
We could climb Mt. Everest, and as we gasp for air
You'll say you love me
And I you

We could do handstands in the sky
And you'll catch me when I fall
I'll take you to the stars and leave you in utter awe
And though standing on a comet with you is absolutely reckless
Loving you is even more so
But I'm happily helpless

Say yes and some days will be not only spring
But we will endure the harsh days winter will bring
Together we will face somber rainy days
But with you by my side we can wait for summer's sunny rays
We will know what makes each other cringe
But hey, we'll take it inch by inch

And though some days you will be too tired to fly with me
I will heal your broken wings
Because our love will exceed that of the highest degree
And we will take willingly what life brings
So say yes
And take my hand
We will learn to tango
Every step we will master

The dance floor is huge and I stand in the center
Nobody around and I stand waiting
For you
No amount of time is too long
To wait for your hand
The best dance of life is with you darlin

Always

Love, Your Edward
xoxoxoxooxxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxooxox

Always in My Dreams

Another Christmas over and they seem to be getting worse every year since leaving our place together.  The past few years have gradually been getting more and more awful with each holiday actually starting to not be looked forward to.  I found myself just wanting the day to just be over with.  The happiest time of the year and I feel like Scrooge about the whole thing anymore.  So far since being up here, every Christmas contains anger, tears, depression, and sadness.  I looked through our holiday pictures and it brightened me up a little bit and thoughts of you along with some Christmas music together made me feel alright.  I miss you so much and wished on every holiday star to be with you again.  You're the only angel I've ever met and would give up all the rest of my holidays just to see you and hold you again.
More, love words to you darlin dew drop Megels

How do I describe
My love for you?
How can I explain
That this is true?

Love is a funny thing
We'll never understand
But hear this truth ring
I'm in love with you

These butterflies
Shy smiles
Late nights
Thoughts are constantly
About you

I can't tell you
All the times
This heart beats faster
Even when you're out of view

Always in my thoughts
Always in my dreams
A life without you would
Tear me apart at the seams

It's you who keeps me up all night
And gets me through the day
It seems to me that there
Is only one thing left to say

I've said it already
But to make sure you know it's true
I'll say how I feel
I'm completely in love with you

My heart will beat for you every single day
Only for you

Always

Love, Your Edward
xoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoox

Christmas Without My True Darling

The most joyous and wonderful day of the year has arrived again and I sit feeling the emptiest I have ever felt.  Not a single anything feels like Christmas and because of the depression and being without you, I almost have a beginning scrooge-like feeling about the holiday where I just don't even want to look at it.  But it wasn't that way and I did feel the happiest times of the holiday when I was with you.  My memories of this season are jam packed with all memories of you and us and the many things that happened.  The first and best of those was when we were working at the Limited and during your one break in between shifts, we popped over to Home Depot to get a little tree for ourselves.  You took a nap in the car for a bit and then we took a night to decorate our little tree with ornaments you brought over as well as the two ornaments that mean the most to me.  One being the penguin on his ice cube sliding and the other being our first Christmas together ornament with Simba and Nala on it.  We took a few minutes afterwards to take pictures of our work and there is one in particular that has been my absolute favorite.  The out of focus you in the background has a very sweet romantic warm feeling to it that pulls my heart strings every single time I see it. 

Every Christmas I associate with you.  The snow reminds me of cleaning it off your car, being warm inside snuggled up with you, the white winter hat you would wear, and getting you gifts.  Your eyes lit up like crazy when you opened Luigi's Mansion and the Supernatural autographs.
We upgraded our holiday after that while we were in a different state starting our new life together.  Getting our first full size tree and lugging it inside our little apartment.  Spending the evening putting up the lights and ornaments while I put on Christmas shows and roasts off of youtube for us to watch.  All of those same ornaments coming back again for a new tradition between us.

When I think of Christmas I think of you, Megels.  No matter what.  Every little thing is a beautiful memory and reminder from the snow to the cold to the tree to the music to the red and green.  I don't want to keep having empty holidays, they just aren't the same without you.
I know we could have the very best and funnest holiday with the two of us being the most adorable nerds there ever was.  I miss you so much and if we are to have one wish every Christmas, then this year my wish would be to have you.  To go back and do whatever it took to not make the mistakes I made and cause the pain that I did.  To tell myself to never leave you down there.  To take advantage of the times you came up here because in the end I suffered more than I ever want to again in my life.  Every day is just tears, pain, and depression to the point where I hate even waking up.  That's not the me I want to be and that's not the me that you fell for.  My Christmas wish is to have you in my arms again.  To pick up where we left off and go the distance this time.  From the nerdy wedding to sharing Supernatural memes and quoting ninja turtles and our favorite movies.  I don't want any gifts  this year, just one cute brown eyed girl. 
I miss you darlin.  You are my Christmas because you bring so much joy and happiness with you.  I am sad unsure if I even cross your mind anymore.  Because you do in mind constantly.  I'm right here and always will be waiting.  You never have to settle, grow up, change, or hide your true self.  This Christmas my wish is you.  I wish upon all the holiday cheer, every shiny ornament and flashing lightbulb.  Christmas just isn't Christmas without you.  I would give anything to come home to you dew drop and kiss you under the mistletoe and hold you warmly under the lights of the tree.  This year, my Christmas goes to Megels, in hopes that I will get the chance to truly show her that her heart is the most precious object in existence and the real reason to celebrate.
I love you darlin
No Christmas will ever be complete without you
I'll be under the tree waiting for you
Mistletoe and love in hand.

Always

Love, Your Christmas Edward
xoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoox